A brief list of the side-effects of detoxing:
- Residual anxiety: I've been treating with this with essential oils. Try lavender, geranium & palma rosa for anxiety or Geranium, Neroli & Nutmeg for depression. (Courtesy of the fabulous The Fragrant Pharmacy by Valerie Ann Worwood). Even with these remedies, I have had one major slip-up but rather dwelling on it, I've tried to move forward.
- Nausea & Headaches: Feeling very nauseous but very light.
- Loss of balance: Certain yoga poses that I've always been able to do now challenge my balance.
- Break-through bleeding
- Half of my upper lip changed colour & got very warm
- Itching, lots and lots of itching.
But as my body returns to me (have lost 8 pounds so far!), I feel more at ease with my life than ever. When people ask me what has helped most with my depression, obviously my meds have saved my life. But what makes my life bearable is: yoga, vegetarianism & trying to eat as clean as possible.
Even on those days when the side-effects take over, I still get to that yoga class and roll out the mat with scarred arms. Because they are scars of the battles I have faced and won. I have hated myself and my body for as long as I can remember. I have wished to be other people, anyone but myself. But with yoga, I fall in love with my body. With what it is capable of. The beautiful thing it is. And how I and it deserve to live. That I have a place in this world and I am rooted to it through my practice.
I stopped eating meat primarily because it was cheaper but then I was struck by this thought that I didn't want to put something dead inside myself. (Yes, I know that plants are dead when I eat them!) But I wanted to embrace a fresher and healthier lifestyle that was based not on the deadly meat industry that is characterized by the greed of humans and the fear and death of animals. It has made such a huge difference as has trying to eat clean and organic. I have fallen in love with quinoa and spinach and shakes and coconut oil. And some might say that the healthy, organic life is all guff and we should all bacon sarnies. But for someone who has struggled self-hatred and feeling out of control all her life, it is so positive. I choose what I eat and I choose to honour my body with good, healthy, nutritious food.
For the first time in my life, I am happy to be here. I don't want to say that yoga and healthy vegetarianism will work for everyone. It won't. But for me, it has given me a life that does not need to survived but has made me thrive.
And when all else fails, as my Mumma says: "At least the flowers make you smile."
These are all flowers from my front garden. The middle ones are called Campanula because they look like bells. The Italian for bell is Campanello.
Kimono: Topshop // Top: New Look // Shorts: Primark // Earrings: New Look // Necklace: Present from the bloke //
Cape: Free People (no longer available in black) // Top: New Look // Skirt: New Look // Hat: ASOS // Scarf: Primark // Earrings: New Look // Necklace: ASOS (reduced!) //
Dress: Urban Outfitters // Skirt: New Look (Wardrobe Staple!) // Earrings: Present from the gorgeous Eve and Milo // Hamsa Necklace: Accessorize // Charm Necklace: ASOS (Reduced!) //
Signalling the 4 pounds I'd lost!
Jumper: Urban Outfitters (Reduced!) // Dress: Free People (only in black & alabaster) // Headscarf: Mum's // Turquoise Necklace: India // Long Necklace: ASOS (Reduced!) // Earrings: ASOS //